中华国风文学论坛
标题:
[原创]七律?游宽甸玄武湖
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作者:
寒雨清秋
时间:
2009-10-18 22:40
标题:
[原创]七律?游宽甸玄武湖
<p> </p>
<p align="center"><font face="黑体" color="#ff0000" size="5"><strong>七律?游宽甸玄武湖</strong></font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#0000ff" size="5"><strong>乡思无际水悠悠，</strong></font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#0000ff" size="5"><strong>十里长堤喜再游。</strong></font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#0000ff" size="5"><strong>我未忘情来渚畔，</strong></font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#0000ff" size="5"><strong>花能如约到枝头。</strong></font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#0000ff" size="5"><strong>莺声共谱齐天乐，</strong></font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#0000ff" size="5"><strong>燕剪全裁隔世愁。</strong></font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#0000ff" size="5"><strong>何事湖边忽翘首，</strong></font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#0000ff" size="5"><strong>碧波呈岫出红楼。</strong></font></p>
作者:
司马长风
时间:
2009-10-20 11:10
<p align=\"left\"><font face=\"楷体_GB2312\" color=\"#0000ff\" size=\"5\"><strong>我未忘情来渚畔，</strong></font><font face=\"楷体_GB2312\" color=\"#0000ff\" size=\"5\"><font color=\"#0000ff\"><strong>花能如约到枝头</strong></font><font color=\"#800080\" size=\"4\">---<strong>见情见性，堪称佳构。</strong></font></font></p>
<p align=\"left\"><font face=\"楷体_GB2312\" color=\"#0000ff\" size=\"5\"><strong>莺声共谱齐天乐，</strong></font><font face=\"楷体_GB2312\" color=\"#0000ff\" size=\"5\"><strong>燕剪全裁隔世愁<font color=\"#800080\" size=\"4\">---莺声只一种，何能“共谱”？“全裁”二字亦需再推敲。</font></strong></font></p>
<p align=\"left\"><strong><font face=\"楷体_GB2312\" color=\"#800080\" size=\"4\">前者见亦见矣，闻亦闻矣，尾联应写出游后所感，宜用情语出之，则佳。</font></strong></p>
<p align=\"left\"><strong><font face=\"楷体_GB2312\" color=\"#800080\" size=\"5\">供参考。</font></strong></p>
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