[原创]浪淘沙?雨夜

淘淘一笑生

<p align="left"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#000000" size="4"><strong>夜雨弄苍茫，</strong></font></p>
<p align="left"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#000000" size="4"><strong>花落飘香。</strong></font></p>
<p align="left"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#000000" size="4"><strong>醒来藤上小螳螂，</strong></font></p>
<p align="left"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#000000" size="4"><strong>正举双钩擒蚱蜢，</strong></font></p>
<p align="left"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#000000" size="4"><strong>相斗何伤！    </strong></font></p>
<p align="left"><font face="楷体_GB2312"></font><font color="#000000" size="4"><strong> </strong></font></p>
<p align="left"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#000000" size="4"><strong>无处遣凄凉，</strong></font></p>
<p align="left"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#000000" size="4"><strong>聊赖秋光。</strong></font></p>
<p align="left"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#000000" size="4"><strong>闲吟雅句泄轻狂。</strong></font></p>
<p align="left"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#000000" size="4"><strong>踏绿凌波留作梦，</strong></font></p>
<p align="left"><font face="楷体_GB2312" color="#000000" size="4"><strong>韵漫篱窗。</strong></font></p>
<p align="left"><font color="#000000"> </font></p>

[此贴子已经被紫嫣郡主于2009-10-01 08:37:16编辑过]

玉笥山翁

题目标重了！结句味悠长！

一介白丁

上片混乱冲题，看来更象是雨后清晨而不象是雨夜。下片转入做作。凄凉一词与下文格格不入。结句不错。欣赏